Jun 16th, 2021
How far is too far? is a question, as a Priest, many couples ask Padre. In this episode our hosts suggest that question comes from a problematic place and instead ask a question like 'what does affection in a healthy, God oriented relationship look like?'.
Modern civilisation seems to equate intimacy with the breaking of boundaries as opposed to setting and respecting of them. When in reality, intimacy is more than the physical, it is also emotional, psychological and spiritual. When we enter into only one of those facets without appropriately seeing the other aspects of a person, we are only ever seeing them in parts. It doesn't allow for intimacy - Into-Me-See
It seems to be that moving in together is the height of intimacy in a relationship. This makes sense when we have lost sight of the gift of life and instead value our status and our assets that we've worked hard for. Sharing of these most valuable things therefore seems to appear to be a form of intimacy when in reality these are external things, they are not part of who we are as a person.
It is VITAL to communicate the impact and effect of affection to your significant other. Every person will be affected differently. Every couple is different, and therefore every couple need their own set of boundaries.
An encouraging message to couples to have confidence and freedom to move within the boundaries set by the church regarding intimacy, and to not feel like you need to create a checklist of behaviours in order to act 'morally', and there is no need to check for morality within every detail of intimacy with you priest. Morality is the result of a lasting relationship with Jesus Christ, therefore it's more than a check box.
Padre - a friend in ministry who has been through a rough patch and thriving through it
Stina - An invitation by a not so familiar person at church