Can men and women be JUST friends Part 3

Part 3 of the conversation where Padre and Stina tie up the loose ends, including some common arguments that are often presented for why men and women cannot be JUST friends, and their response to this. 

Padre outlines that men and women are made for communion/togetherness, but to pretend this is impossible outside of romantic relationship is limiting. There is a unique level of communion in marriage, but this is not the only path of communion with one another.

'Our thoughts and desires are subject to reason, not the other way around' - Padre

Stina questioned whether Jesus would have warned Mary Magdalene to not befriend the disciples as she followed him, in case that should cause a romantic attraction between them and be deemed uncharitable. 

Padre and Stina's response then, is that male and female friendships are possible with appropriate boundaries, and disagree that all relationships of opposite sex will necessarily form a romantic attraction. 

If it's not possible to be friends beyond romantic attraction, then how can we expect fidelity in marriage, after all, there is no Altar Switch (as Sarah Swafford would say). Men and women can't then look at the beauty of one another without indulging their sexual desires in a selfish manner, and it tells us that human sexuality has no other function other than procreation which is NOT a Christian attitude to the body.

The Body is the means through which we express our masculine and feminine genius, and serve others, and through the body the truth of who I am and who lives in me is brought to light.

 

Isn't it most charitable to simple avoid this kind of relationship, so that there is no risk of this happening? Stina responds that in some relationships this may be appropriate, but there are two things to consider.

1. We cannot assume responsibility for another persons thoughts and desires, to take that responsibility away from them, places a limit on their capacity and their free will

2. Risk is there for 2 reasons, The first is to encourage us to safeguard the relationship, and the second is to give us courage to step outside of ourselves to make a gift of ourselves in service of the other. How can we begin to do that, if our first response is to avoid the opposite sex?

Interestingly many of the arguments given by Christian circles tend to be the same as the atheistic secular world. 

Our hosts would love to hear your thoughts, or tell us if you disagree and why, we welcome the dialogue.

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Truth Beauty and Goodness (T.B.G)

Padre - Consecration to St Joseph Click here Or Join the Facebook Group

Stina - Bible in a Year Podcast (with Fr Mike Schmitz) By Ascension Press Click here